Getting Started. November 21, 2008

I'm not sure what it was that finally got this resolve going again. I'm not sure if it was looking at pictures of me that were more profile and realizing.... I'm HUGE... I think part of it also was coming to this realization that I could have been fooling myself all this time about how my weight wasn't THAT big a health issue. After all, my blood pressure, my cholesterol, all that was always in good shape. Maybe it was getting tired of worrying about whether a chair was going to hold up under me, but somewhere, I finally got some of that resolve back that... there has to be less of me.

Okay, I'm pretty sure that's not what John the Baptist meant when he said 'he must increase, i must decrease.' Of course, now that I bring it up I know that when I look at my life as a whole, there probably is some real truth to that statement on a more spiritual level. Self has been too big an emphasis in my life, so yeah, in that regard, there has to be less of me as well.

But I digress. (If you read much of this at all, you'll find I do that a lot. So beware the digress.)

Years ago I was really resolved to lose weight and went on the Atkins diet. I did great, for awhile. Somewhere along the line, I stalled after losing about 80 some pounds, stayed steady for awhile, (still needing to lose a lot) and eventually, started gaining it back. Eventually turned to rapidly, to where I'm back where I started all those years ago. Plus a wee bit more. :-( I know I was always asking myself, whatever happened to that resolve. I'm not sure I know the answer to that, but... at least for now it's back.

So, my wife and I were talking about diets, and a doctor friend of hers had said the South Beach diet's a good one to try, it was developed by a cardiologist, and in my mind it had enough similarities to what worked well for me in the past, so... November 21 it began.

Holy cow vegetables are expensive!!!!

So then, we get to the 193 part of the name of this blog. I set a goal of 200, that's my ideal weight. But... what is my current weight? That was a tough one cuz, (and this part has always been hard to say anywhere publically cuz it's just plain embarassing) well... the scale in the house wouldn't weigh me. I got a new scale, one that goes to 385 pounds, that should work. I KNOW I'm not THAT heavy. It wouldn't weigh me either.

That in itself added a bit of resolve. That's just hard to swallow, you know?

So I needed to know a starting point, so I wandered into one of those walkin clinics and asked to borrow their scale. I don't know if you can imagine doing that... until I did, I couldn't. Ummm, yeah, I'm too fat for my scale, can I use yours?

Anyway, I weighed 396 pounds. Another of those hard to swallow things, but at least I hadn't cracked 400 yet? I've always been able to get away with saying I'm 350 or even less because I'm tall enough that it's maybe not that obvious, but still. 396? So, at the time I figured that clothes and shoes took up 3 of those, and because I have this thing about not wanting to overstate how much I did lose once it's lost, I figured that means I'm really about 393. So, 193 to go.

Now the 5420 part of the title. I just moved to Denver this summer when my wife Janiece and I were married. It made more sense to move here, where she's from, than back to Nebraska where I'm from, so here I am. I'm loving it. I can remember back to the first time I ever got out to Colorado deeply envying people who lived in Colorado. My first girlfriend in college was from Colorado. Hmmm..... come to think of it there were a number of girls that were from Colorado I ended up liking, which really is making me wonder about myself right now. If there are any psychologists reading this right now, I really hope you don't know me.... Annnnnnnnnnnnyway... each day I find myself loving it more and more out here. Now one thing I noticed is people love that 5280 thing, 5,280 feet above sea level, one mile... magazines, restaurants, businesses, all naming themselves 5280. So I was gonna do 5280 in the title, but the geek in me had to look up in Google Earth, and we're actually at 5420. So there you have it.

Geez I ramble a lot, don't I?

Anyway, fast forward several weeks. I actually made it through Christmas week losing weight that week, so I was pretty proud of myself. You probably cannot imagine the jubilation I felt when I could actually use my new scale. I committed myself to getting out more, getting more exercise, all of that. I stalled after a couple weeks, was in this limbo through mid december, and then it's been really great these last 2 weeks or so. This morning, I broke the 375 barrier. Okay, 374.8, but still.... 18.2 down, 174.8 to go. (this kind of thing challenges my math skills)

Then this past weekend, as part of my Christmas present from my wife, we went out and got me fitted for a new bike. I used to ride a lot in the past but that's another thing I let slip. I've been ecstatic to see all the bike trails around here and chomping at the bit to get back on a bike, so... here's my chance.

So, in the end, when it's all said and done, what this blog is about is... well it will probably be more like a kind of rambling stuff here and there, so maybe about everything? Life, work, play, faith, kids, pets, sports, who knows?

But what I wanted to do more than anything was use this as a way to journal this journey... hey, that's kinda catchy, isn't it? Remind me sometime to tell the story of how I named my Creative Writing journal 'Earl' back in High School.... (see what I mean about digressing?). So, some of it is for my own sake, so I can look back and see how I've been doing, what I was feeling, all that kind of stuff. I want to put emphasis on whether this diet is working, and how the whole bike thing is going, because I'd like to be able to see the progress. Part of it I'm sure is a blatant search for encouragement, a chance to shout out LOOK AT ME!!! (Which as there's less fear of having people look at me). But there's another part too, and that's the fact that I know I can do this, and I'm confident it's going to happen. I want this to be something where maybe there's someone out there who isn't so sure about themself, so... I'm hoping it can be something that says hey, if I can do this, we know it's possible.

That confidence hasn't always been there for me. Some past success has helped. The love and encouragement of my wife has been a tremendous help in this. There are just enough of the right things happening at the right time for me lately that I'm in a place I don't know I've been in for a long time, maybe never, but... well anyway, that would be digression number 243 I think... (I start to wonder if I'm A.D.D.) but I'm so encouraged and so thankful for the support I've had, and maybe this is a way to offer support for someone else.

Or maybe it's just a LOOK AT ME kinda thing like I was saying before, who knows?

So before I get into digression number 244, I want to finish this up with some daily stuff:

Weigh in this morning: 374.8 Lost: 18.2
Measurements (this morning was the first time I measured):
Chest: 59 3/4 inches Lost: 0
Waist: 59 3/4 inches Lost: 0
Hips: 52 1/2 inches Lost: 0

Walking: 2.15 miles. Accumulated: 2.15 miles
Biking: 0 miles. Accumulated: 0

(now I can cut and paste this to future posts. Cool huh?)

Okay, so that concludes this post. I think. Though I am starting to rethink the 5420 thing, cuz... my bedroom's in the basement, 7 feet below ground level, so, 5413?

Really am starting to wonder about that whole ADD thing......